Day 6 - To dream and be scared

First I would like to say that It I am surprised at how therapeutic writing all these exciting things that accompany such a drastically life altering move is and just as therapeutic to write about all those things that scare you. We may look back at some of our fears and giggle as our future new immigrant selves shake our heads at our younger, more naive selves having wasted time on such pointless worries, but my guess is we will also remember all those things we will one day know that we do not today. Worry can be that needed catalyst to research a fear only to discover that there is nothing to worry about or that taking a particular action will prevent a fear from materializing.So I say worry and dream, dream and worry. Do it both together or do it apart but just don’t ever, ever, ever do one for too long and omit the other. They are both part of the same equation and you will never get the answer without both!
I think Michelle’s last post is an interesting one in that it really highlights some of the drastic differences in both of our lives, or at least the events that led us the points in our lives that we are in. Although I always knew of these differences, I never applied them to something like this and may really never have if she hadn’t brought it up now. She is absolutely right in that this move will be difficult on us and that, in a large part, is why we have started up this blog (and I am sure that more reasons will surface as we continue). As she hinted on in her previous post, I am relatively well traveled. When I was 9, my father and I crammed packed and drove (ok, he drove and I obsessed over a sign that simply read “?” to which we discovered after a day and a half of driving at the edge of our seats, that it just meant “information”. Duh!) a beat up, green van across Canada to Calgary. (Drastic Move number one!). A year later, my father got a job offer that he took in Cambridge, England. We moved (decided to fly, not drive this time!) and I found myself the centre of attention, surrounded by very interested English boys (and girls, thank God!) wanting to be friends with the funny sounding kid. (Drastic Move number two!). About a year later, he received another job offer back to Calgary. I do recall that it was just over a year because when my father was questioned at immigration, he told the officers that we had stayed in England for just under a year to which I proudly spoke up to remind my father, and all the officers, every the reason why I was sure that we had been in the country just over a year. I am not too sure what happened next, but I do remember seeing my father coming out of a room about two hours later walking funny with an officer on either side, Not too sure what that was all about but we eventually made it back to Canadian soil. (Oh ya, Drastic Move number three) Remarkably, about a year later, he received a job offer once again to Edinburgh. I am not too sure but I think my father jumped at the chance to go as he was born in Scotland. He was too young to remember it but I truly believe he is all Scotland at heart. So, we packed up our lives again and flew to Scotland and one of us had lips so tight at immigration, an updraft to a hairy Scottish kilt-wearing man could not gasp them open! So, off to the land of bagpipes and kilts and an experience that would not really take hold of me for years and years to come. (Drastic Move number four) About a year later, I decided to return to Canada to live with my mother, a decision that was by far the most difficult one of my life, even to date. (Drastic Move number five) I have moved about 15 times since then (no, I’m not kidding) and all but one within the Greater Toronto Area. For a few years, I did live up near Newmarket as well. As for Michelle, the only drastic move she has made is in with me! My very long-winded point is that this is going to be so much more difficult for Michelle than it will be for me, even though this will be quite the Drastic Move for both of us. But we will be there beside one another and support one another and be open about all those things that scare us and all those things we dream about.
So I guess my only question left is, based on Michelle’s last post, does she expect me to get her a flying sheep when we move there?!?! And if so,am I supposed to be scared about this or excited?!?!

Dreamin’ and fearin’……….
-Will